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Always something to say

March 26, 2013
By Kim Boyer

Recently there was a domestic situation with a woman shot in the hand by her husband, and unfortunately they found 17 dogs in the home, as well as the house being unlivable.

Unfortunately, this is the result of physical and mental abuse. I am so sick of hearing people trash this woman, saying she doesn't deserve to be a mother because a mother would have left a situation like this one, but that's not always the case.

An abused man or woman doesn't always leave their abuser, for many reasons such as fear, dependency, hope that they can change, and many more reasons. We who aren't abused will never know how it feels.

I personally know her, and she was always a good mother and kept her children clean. Unfortunately, she gave up her home. This is very overwhelming for those who have to deal with abusive situations, especially when you have a young child who is brain damaged and cries almost all of the time, as well as taking care of two more young children with no help from her husband. I was a single mother, and it was hard as hell to do everything on my own, but I thank God for giving me the strength to keep moving forward.

The sad part of this whole thing is all the smiles you see on the outside are not always happy; there are actually tormented souls inside. People don't always know what's going on behind closed doors.

I'm sorry, but she should not be judged by the way she lived. She had nobody to help her and was not allowed to have anybody around. I am there helping her to the best of my abilities, along with other friends who do not judge her. Some of you trashing her need to look in your own mirrors and, if anything, pray for her to have the strength to never go back to a man who abuses her like that. It's not a normal life! But when you live it, it becomes you and seems normal. Until you've been there, you will never understand what she's been through. She's a wonderful person and has always been a good mother to her children!

I would also like to make it clear, before I'm judged next, that I love animals and my heart goes out to those dogs involved. Again, to some people, all animal hoarding is wrong, but in the eyes of some people, like herself, the animals are all they have. Don't get me wrong: There is a difference of people who just do this for the greed and money, but then you have the 80-year-old lady who has 16 cats and takes care of them all because she doesn't have a heart to get rid of them all. Remember, animals love you unconditionally! Be good to the animal or beat the animal, clean house or dirty house, good person or bad person, food or no food, THEY STILL LOVE YOU!

So please, to all the people saying all these nasty things, I'd like for you to go home tonight and kiss your husbands, wives, girlfriends and boyfriends, and thank them for not beating you and for being there to help you through everything you go through, because not everybody has a fairy-tale ending. Bruises go away after a while, but the mental abuse stays with you forever. Take time to look up the statistics on abuse, look on the Internet, and see what you find about mental and physical abuse and what can happen. They either keep getting beaten because they don't leave, they kill themselves, or they get killed by their abusers. Again, pray for those people like her!

Also, to make it clear, yes, there were animal droppings in the house and a lot of clothes, but the animal droppings were in two rooms where the animals were, not throughout the whole house. Please try to understand: This woman was very overwhelmed due to mental and physical abuse. It doesn't make it right, but she needs help, not people trashing her. What has happened to compassion in this world and helping the needy? They should not be judged. Take a walk in their shoes. I know some of you already have and still continue to trash this lady; that's not how it should be. If anything, you guys should understand it and pray for her and her children.

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Kim Boyer lives in Vermontville.

 
 

 

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