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What a croc!

September 10, 2008

I remember the first time I saw him. It's still so fresh in my mind - like it happened yesterday. What could I do? I'd had my share of drinks that night. But just the same, there it was, coming out of the water toward me.

Of course, I'm talking about the first time I'd seen that crocodile that lives in Lake Placid. Oh, you hadn't heard? Yeah, it's real - I've seen it. They even made a movie about it a few years back.

I mean, just look at those film credits - Bill Pullman, Oliver Platt, Bridget Fonda - I mean, helllloooooo! You don't think Bill Pullman would sign on for a film this ridiculous if it wasn't based on a true story, do you? I mean, he was our president in "Independence Day," for goodness sakes - I still can't get over how well they documented the near-catastrophic alien invasion of 1995. Riveting film.

Article Photos

An invasive species? I’d say so!
(Photo courtesy of YouTube)

No, my friend, that crocodile is out there.

It's as real as you and me. Maybe even realer. Anyway, I did some digging, and it turns out it's technically called a "Super Croc." They said so on the Discovery Channel, not that I believe everything I see on there.

I mean, am I really supposed to believe we put a man on the moon way back in, like, 1969? Please. I'm gonna write an open letter to the Discovery Channel and title it: "Do you really think we're this stupid?"

Fact Box

YouTube keywords:

Lake Placid crocodile

So, now, I'm just trying to get the word out about this crocodile problem, before someone gets hurt. It's not a joke. What can you do? Well, you can start out by educating yourself about the way it moves and feeds in case - God forbid - you ever find yourself face to face with the beast. You can find clips from the movie on YouTube.

Have you seen the scene where it eats the bear? Or when it eats Betty White's cow? Wow. You can't fake that.

I've been saying for years that people should be more careful on that lake. I've always said, "If I can just save one person" from a fate like that poor scuba diver, I'll be happy.

Hopefully this will help. Thank God for YouTube.

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